No Thanks, I'm Not Hungry

the life of a TYPICAL emo kid with fag hair. (Not really)

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Ughh, I dont know what to think

I have to move to NYC after all. Afer thinking life has been so good for me, it suddenly turned upside down.

 Even after how unreasonable and completely stupid my moms decisions are, Im more sad than angry. I cant believe Im going to be leaving behind everything now and starting off somewhere new and big. My friends Sarah and Michael wants to throw a farewell party for me but i dont want to go through all that trouble and it might get too emotional. I just want to keep in touch with everyone so Im collecting emails and facebooks. This is just lame. I'm not returning ever again... I should atleast be able to visit. When I asked my mother she said "maybe." She's not the type of mom you could talk to and she definately isnt a listener. Like I said, Im more sad than mad. Kind of depressed that my parents are people who make poor decisions in their life and don't go anywhere far.
The most i can do right now is look at the future in an optimistic way and stop looking back. I'll be free there. I might achieve my dreams, meet new people and have alot more, i might be able to keep in touch with my friends and maybe they could visit me and i could visit them soon.

I havent even told Kaylie yet. we'll have to lose everything this soon.. So much for hoping.
Currently in my room, forced to pack. Seriously, FUCK THIS SHIT ):

I've had a long day, excuse me for the negativity. I hope you are all doing well.
Pce, Nate

11 comments:

  1. Maybe you'll find something in New York that will make everything better. It's a huge city and is loaded with opportunity. I hope that everything will be fine for you.

    I'm sorry about you and Kaylie though. Stay strong.

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  2. I'm sorry about everything, I truly am.
    But it is good to look at the future with a positive attitude. even if it feels like your not going anywhere.
    But eventually things will turn out okay.
    Give Chris a big hug. I feel like he's going to miss you a ton.

    love ari.

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  3. Oh my gosh, I can't believe you actually have to leave! This is terrible, I'm extremely sorry Nate. Your parents are horrible )= It also sucks that you just started things with that girl. Good luck though, I would actually love to visit New York!
    xoxo- Ryssa

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  4. I'm sorry That's awful, moving away from all your friends and now kaylie too : (
    My mom sent me away once before and it lead to spiraling depression and be becoming fat so I can empathize : / NYC sounds like a cool place to live though. I'm sure you can find lots of things to make you happy there.

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  5. Like you said - you have to look at this as an oppotunity.
    I am sorry about you and Kaylie though, that sucks.
    xx

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  6. i am SO sorry. i cant even imagine having a less-than supportive, amazing mom. you're handling it very well. its really ok to be negative sometimes, and I'd say now is the exception. haha im sorry you have to leave all your friends, but who knows? you might find something so amazing in nyc, maybe you're meant to go there, for whatever reason :)

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  7. AW! I really thought things were going well, too. I'm so so so sorry this is happening. But I think you're right--you should look to the positive. Although I'm inclined to say that this is very unfair and your mother is being really unreasonable. But she may change her mind after you leave. It sucks about you and Kaylie, though. I hope things work out for you in NYC! I've heard many people like it there. Feel better soon :)

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  8. FUCK, FUCK, FUCK!!! I'm so sorry, Nate. What happens to good people when they become parents?!

    You shouldn't feel bad for hoping, hoping is what makes us human. I hope for only good things for you. May there be many wonderful things waiting for you on the other side. Hang in there, my friend.

    Thinking of you. XXX.

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  9. I'm sorry to hear you're being forced to move. It sucks that we aren't given a chance to voice our opinions, but that's life i suppose, nothing is ever fair. Good luck to your new life in NYC, and like you said you could find many new oppurtunities and good luck may come your way. It sucks you didn't get to see your relationship potentially blossom.

    You should have a party, so waht if things get emotional? Celebrate all the good times you've shared and what you will share in the future. Keep your Chin up :)
    x

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  10. I'm sorry you have to be uprooted. And, admittedly, you'll probably hate it at first. Snow is beautiful, but the cold part is kind of a deal-breaker for people who have to live with it. There are a lot of amazing things about New York. It's pretty much the whole world in a bubble. You'll probably grow a lot there.

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